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Dear Yakko,
Ordinarily, I'd be trying to ask Wakko some of this stuff cause his answers would be more nonsensical, and by the time the conversation was over I'd forget why I was even upset and going to him in the first place. That's why I've always said Wakko was my therapist and you were my older brother. But tonight, I'm in serious need of my older brother sib, and not my therapist. Specifically, I kinda wish I had one iteration of you that I know is ridiculous to even entertain having again.
So as I'm sure you're well aware since you live in my head as much as the other muses in my life do, I saw Nickelwise last night for the first time since the first time I'd seen it. I had made a point of not rewatching it because we (Brittani and I) had spent quite a bit of time with that story arc in RP and then in my Jess fanfics. It was such an odd experience, honestly. With the new headcanon she had given me, watching you go through that story was a bit painful and upsetting, and really, I just wanted to jump through that screen and hug you when you started panicking. Ridiculous, yes. and maybe to the friends reading this a bit insane, but my friends who read this also know how real you guys are to me and maybe they'll take that into consideration and not disown me? anyway.
When the sketch was over, while Pinky and The Brain's segment was running, I messaged Brittani about it. I told her I'd seen our Nickelwise episode and that it'd made me sad. For a while, she'd said nothing. Then finally I only got back, "I'm sorry."
This morning, she came back with, "You were talking about Nickelwise, right?" and I said, "Yes." and hoped for more conversation when she realized that's the episode I was referring to. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch.
Did I mention this follows about a week and a half ago where I had asked, politely, if she'd give you up in the Warner RP officially since she was no longer RPing there anyway? I'd wanted to pick up the mantle since the Tower had no real Yakko except for Ruegger, and with Brayan, bless him, getting so busy with school, being unable to be online as much anymore, he can't really take the mantle as much as he'd love to. Her reply was just as cold. Amd clearly a refusal, and even though she technically should NOT have a say, I can't bring myself to bring a Yakko into Tower without her blessing. I wonder if I should ask Rob...he'd probabl give it to me. He'd probably also tell me this is a bunch of bullshit. He doesn't pull punches in reality, honestly.
But seriously. She is hurting me in ways I can't understand. Over you. OVER YOU, Yakko. And I don't know how to make the hurting stop. I don't want it to end up with me hating the show that brought us together. Because I've needed you and your siblings for SO SO long and I didn't know I needed you again until you returned to me in 2020. It hurts, Yakko. It physically, mentally, and emotionally HURTS. and she doesn't KNOW it, and I don't know how to tell her. I've tried every way I can think of to pretend Yakko was never there. Um. Well. That doesn't exactly work. What really HURTS for me? "Yakko doesn't NEED to be leader". Um? are you FUCKING KIDDING ME?!! Excuse you? That is his WHOLE schtick! He is the BIG BROTHER! Yakko is the big brother, Wakko is the eating stuff guy (Sorry, Wakko, I know you really want to be more, and to ME you always will be) and Dot is the cute feminist. But Yakko...his role has always been Big brother, leader. Don't TELL ME HE DOESN'T NEED TO BE THE LEADER!!!
Sorry. That really really really didn't sit well with me, considering how she always played you, and how she got ME to write you. I wrote you that way cause that's how I observed her writing you and how I saw Rob play you. Hyo-fucking-crite. Yes, I am raging over this. It makes me so fucking angry. Like, who does she think she is, stripping that responsibility from Yakko like that?!! At least pass it to someone who wants to be there and give you the respect you deserve. I mean, geezus.
I've been bottling this shit up a lot, and it's been eating at me and hurting and making it harder and harder to play in Tower in the Warner Brothers RP when Shane and Brayan aren't there. (The only other "Warner" players in the RP now) . It just really hurts to be the only OG Warner left,
and I'm having a lot of trouble with the distance between me and the player, too. So I'm SURE that's got a lot to do with it too. Brittani and I aren't talking much either. We have idea how to talk to each since she left the RP. Nothing rfeally in common, and we used to talk *all* the time. I really don't know anymore how to approach her with me feeling so abandoned and hurt. It kinda feels like a betrayal. Maybe a second betrayal, technically. But I don't want to get into that right now.
And now for some lyrics that perfectly sum up how I am feeling about Brittani right now.
( Only A Memory by Icon for Hire )
Ordinarily, I'd be trying to ask Wakko some of this stuff cause his answers would be more nonsensical, and by the time the conversation was over I'd forget why I was even upset and going to him in the first place. That's why I've always said Wakko was my therapist and you were my older brother. But tonight, I'm in serious need of my older brother sib, and not my therapist. Specifically, I kinda wish I had one iteration of you that I know is ridiculous to even entertain having again.
So as I'm sure you're well aware since you live in my head as much as the other muses in my life do, I saw Nickelwise last night for the first time since the first time I'd seen it. I had made a point of not rewatching it because we (Brittani and I) had spent quite a bit of time with that story arc in RP and then in my Jess fanfics. It was such an odd experience, honestly. With the new headcanon she had given me, watching you go through that story was a bit painful and upsetting, and really, I just wanted to jump through that screen and hug you when you started panicking. Ridiculous, yes. and maybe to the friends reading this a bit insane, but my friends who read this also know how real you guys are to me and maybe they'll take that into consideration and not disown me? anyway.
When the sketch was over, while Pinky and The Brain's segment was running, I messaged Brittani about it. I told her I'd seen our Nickelwise episode and that it'd made me sad. For a while, she'd said nothing. Then finally I only got back, "I'm sorry."
This morning, she came back with, "You were talking about Nickelwise, right?" and I said, "Yes." and hoped for more conversation when she realized that's the episode I was referring to. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch.
Did I mention this follows about a week and a half ago where I had asked, politely, if she'd give you up in the Warner RP officially since she was no longer RPing there anyway? I'd wanted to pick up the mantle since the Tower had no real Yakko except for Ruegger, and with Brayan, bless him, getting so busy with school, being unable to be online as much anymore, he can't really take the mantle as much as he'd love to. Her reply was just as cold. Amd clearly a refusal, and even though she technically should NOT have a say, I can't bring myself to bring a Yakko into Tower without her blessing. I wonder if I should ask Rob...he'd probabl give it to me. He'd probably also tell me this is a bunch of bullshit. He doesn't pull punches in reality, honestly.
But seriously. She is hurting me in ways I can't understand. Over you. OVER YOU, Yakko. And I don't know how to make the hurting stop. I don't want it to end up with me hating the show that brought us together. Because I've needed you and your siblings for SO SO long and I didn't know I needed you again until you returned to me in 2020. It hurts, Yakko. It physically, mentally, and emotionally HURTS. and she doesn't KNOW it, and I don't know how to tell her. I've tried every way I can think of to pretend Yakko was never there. Um. Well. That doesn't exactly work. What really HURTS for me? "Yakko doesn't NEED to be leader". Um? are you FUCKING KIDDING ME?!! Excuse you? That is his WHOLE schtick! He is the BIG BROTHER! Yakko is the big brother, Wakko is the eating stuff guy (Sorry, Wakko, I know you really want to be more, and to ME you always will be) and Dot is the cute feminist. But Yakko...his role has always been Big brother, leader. Don't TELL ME HE DOESN'T NEED TO BE THE LEADER!!!
Sorry. That really really really didn't sit well with me, considering how she always played you, and how she got ME to write you. I wrote you that way cause that's how I observed her writing you and how I saw Rob play you. Hyo-fucking-crite. Yes, I am raging over this. It makes me so fucking angry. Like, who does she think she is, stripping that responsibility from Yakko like that?!! At least pass it to someone who wants to be there and give you the respect you deserve. I mean, geezus.
I've been bottling this shit up a lot, and it's been eating at me and hurting and making it harder and harder to play in Tower in the Warner Brothers RP when Shane and Brayan aren't there. (The only other "Warner" players in the RP now) . It just really hurts to be the only OG Warner left,
and I'm having a lot of trouble with the distance between me and the player, too. So I'm SURE that's got a lot to do with it too. Brittani and I aren't talking much either. We have idea how to talk to each since she left the RP. Nothing rfeally in common, and we used to talk *all* the time. I really don't know anymore how to approach her with me feeling so abandoned and hurt. It kinda feels like a betrayal. Maybe a second betrayal, technically. But I don't want to get into that right now.
And now for some lyrics that perfectly sum up how I am feeling about Brittani right now.
( Only A Memory by Icon for Hire )
